|Guide to: Making New Friends and Positives & Negatives|
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"Guide to: Making New Friends and Positives & Negatives" is a season 3 episode of Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide.
Part 1: Making New Friends
Moze notes that Ned and Cookie haven't made any new friends in a while, so she tries to get them to make friends with Faymen. But Faymen makes it clear he doesn't like Ned. Moze wants Ned and Faymen to be friends because she and Faymen are going out. Moze also says she'll take Ned to a nail salon and spa if he does this for her, but Ned declines the spa offer, even after she says that men get manicures all the time. He says she should take a girl, but Moze can't think of anyone. She decides to take a girl from the volleyball team. Meanwhile, Cookie has lost his lucky pen. Ned tries to make friends with Faymen, but thinks don't go smoothly. Moze asks the volleyball team if they'd like to go to the spa with her, but they all bolt. Cookie finds Gordy using another crazy method to catch the weasel.
Cookie goes looking for his pen, but instead finds the weasel. The weasel reaches behind a stack of books and retrieves Cookie's lucky pen. Cookie is appreciative, gives the weasel a cracker, and makes friends with it. He even makes a little condo for it in his locker. Moze uses Cookie's yearbook to pick out a new best friend: Sylvia Gumpopper. Gordy thinks Ned is jealous of Faymen, and that Faymen is perfect. Ned goes out to prove Faymen isn't perfect so Moze will dump him and Ned won't have to be his friend. Moze tries making friends with Sylvia but, true to her name, she pops her gum incessantly and Moze bails.
Ned puts ten bucks on the floor for Faymen to find. Ned catches him taking the money and blasts him for not taking it to the main office. Faymen says whenever he finds money, he saves it to give to charity. He challenges Faymen to a dance-off, since Moze hates bad dancers, but Faymen can dance really well. Ned gets Missy to hit on Faymen and ask him out, but he rebuffs her advances. Cookie tries to steal the weasel food but is caught by Gordy. Gordy figures out that Cookie is hiding the weasel. Cookie tells him that the weasel is good and can be trained. Gordy gives him until the end of the day to prove it, or he's shipping the weasel off to Paraguay.
Ned decides to fake a friendship with Faymen for Moze's sake. He suggests she make friends with someone she doesn't like, since she and Suzie didn't like each other before they became friends. Moze asks Missy if she wants to go and Missy agrees. Ned apologizes to Faymen, but Faymen says that since Moze talks about Ned all the time, he sort of didn't want to like him. He reveals to Ned that he lies a lot, and they bond over the lies they've told.
Cookie gets ready to show Gordy a trick the weasel can do, but it just attacks Gordy, who crashes into Missy. Ned joins intramural indoor soccer with Faymen, and Missy is unable to go to the spa because of her injuries from when Gordy crashed into her. So, for Moze's sake, Ned and Cookie decide to dress up as girls and go to the spa with her.
- Tip#302.ROW - Wanna make new friends? Rule out weasels.
- Tip#332.TCS - Try: school clubs, new lunch tables, and intramural sports.
- Tip#332.DJQ - Don't judge new friends too quickly.
Part 2: Positives & Negatives
Sweeney talks about positive and negative charges in static electricity in science class, leading Loomer to rub his feet on a carpet sample and shock Cookie. In math class, there's a new transfer student, Mark Downer, who has a very pessimistic and depressing attitude. His attitude rubs off on the rest of the class. Moze is excited about a big date with Faymen, because she thinks they might finally kiss. And lo and behold, they kiss at the end of their date, but Moze doesn't feel a spark. Moze shares this with Ned, and swears that the next kiss will be magical.
Ned runs from Mark, desperate not to catch his negative attitude. Cookie puts on a big sweater and rubs himself with balloons to shock Loomer back, but accidentally shocks himself when he opens his locker. Cookie decides to make himself positively charged instead of negatively, and Ned decides to try this with Mark. He tells Moze it's better to run at your problems than to run from them. Moze decides to run at Faymen and kiss him, like in the movies. But right before they reach each other, they slip on the floor and their lips crash into each other. Gordy comes by and puts up a "wet floor" sign.
Ned tries to be positive with Mark, but fails and becomes negative. Ned tries to get Martin Qwerly to help, since he's the most positive person in school. Professor Xavier helps Moze with her problem, since she reads a lot of romance novels and knows how to create a spark. She gets help from the AV Club, gardening club, and choir to help out. Martin tries making Mark more positive, but Mark's negativity overpowers him. Ned gets Sarah, another negative student at school, to talk to Mark. It seems that they're bonding, but Cookie and Gordy have turned the library into an electro-static time bomb, and if they touch, they'll get shocked. Mark and Sarah kiss and get shocked, but they enjoy it.
Professor Xavier has turned the gym into a romantic beach setting. Faymen is amazed by everything and kisses Moze, but she still feels nothing. Now that Mark and Sarah are happy with each other, there's much more positivity in the air. Cookie wears a rubber suit to prevent him from getting shocked, and make Loomer and Crony shock each other.
- Faymen as himself
- It is revealed that a Goth girl is immune to shock.
- According to Moze, it is true that guys get manicures all the time.
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