|Guide to: Music Class and Class Clown|
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Part 1: Music Class
Ned daydreams about being a rock star in his Music Instruction class. His teacher, Mr. Gibson, says Ned needs to master the basics before he can become a rock star energy drink. Cookie plays a music track on his computer, but Mr. Gibson says it's not an instrument. Mr. Gibson tells Cookie he has to play a real instrument to pass the class, and gives him a recorder. Moze tells Ned to transfer to her Music Instruction class, where they listen to music and nap. Cookie is frustrated and nervous that he can't play the recorder, and that his computer is not an instrument.
Moze's Music Appreciation class is studying Mozart, which she and the other pupils find incredibly boring. Mr. Combover, realizing that everyone treats his class as "nap time with a soundtrack", makes the whole class listen to CDs he's made for them so the music will be ingrained in their minds or he will flunk all of them. Ned is still bored in Music Instruction. Mr. Gibson tells Ned that the rock star life is not all smoking crack, which is why he gave it up. Cookie tries to fake play the recorder but is caught. Mr. Gibson tells Cookie to have confidence in himself. Moze listens to Mr. Combover's CD, but it just puts her to sleep. In fact, she misses most of her classes. Cookie's new instrument is a marching clarinet, which wakes Moze up. When she wakes, the classical music is still playing in her head, even with the headphones off.
Ned decides to quit Music Instruction. Mr. Gibson asks Ned what he can do to change his mind, but Ned says there isn't anything. But when Ned leaves, it appears Mr. Gibson has an idea. During volleyball practice, Moze can't get the classical music out of her head, which throws her off her game. In need of some real music, she takes Suzie's headphones, but Suzie's listening to Mozart, saying she kind of likes it. Moze sees Mr. Combover for help. He tells her Mozart is not all one-note, and that certain pieces can fit with certain situations. Mr. Combover tells Moze to find her clarinet song.
Cookie is glad he can play an instrument that's not a republic credit. But the marching bass drum is heavy. When he sets it down, it rolls down the stairs, down the hall, and into Mr. Gibson, then into Ned, and Moze, and finally kills Mozart. He tells Cookie to try a lighter instrument. Cookie asks if they can pick it now, but Mr. Gibson says he has an important lesson to teach. Cookie says if the lesson is for Ned, he has to drive it home. Ned sees Mr. Combover for a transfer slip, but hears loud, pounding rock music from the hallway. He finds Mr. Gibson, out of his teacher clothes, playing guitar and singing. He and his band follow Ned around all day, until Ned concedes, saying Mr. Gibson knows best. He reminds Ned that he has to master the basics to play anything. Ned decides not to transfer out of Music Instruction. Moze picks a dramatic Mozart piece as her volleyball song.
- Tip#692.PMB - Practice and master the basics.
- Tip#780.typm - Be open to other types of music - you might like it.
- Tip#784.FTRI - Keep trying until you find the right instrument.
Part 2: Class Clown
Todd, the class clown, is moving to Cleveland. Ned and Cookie are sad, but Moze isn't, because she didn't think Todd was that funny. A storm cloud forms over the school and hovers over it, making the atmosphere inside the school very gray and dull. According to Cookie's calculations, Todd wasted an average of three minutes per class period, which made each period seem shorter and the day go by faster. Sweeney announces that with Todd gone, he'll be able to give more quizzes. Moze agrees with the boys and thinks they need a new class clown, and thinks Ned should do it.
Ned tries to be class clown in science, but bombs. Morris Adams, who sits in front of Moze, makes a joke about Ned's act and she laughs. Moze is about to tell Ned when Cookie shows up wearing a "Laugh-Master 9000", which makes laugh track sounds after every joke he makes and other sound effects. Cookie tests it out in Sweeney's class and gets a few laughs from the class. Sweeney catches Cookie and sends him to Crubbs, who gives him a day of detention and confiscates the "Laugh-Master 9000".
Moze, Ned, and Gordy meet Cookie in the main office, where Gordy reveals he was the class clown in school. Ned has Gordy talk to him through an earpiece so he can say stuff that makes the class laugh. However, Gordy is attacked by the weasel and Ned is still repeating everything he's saying. Sweeney yells at Ned to stop, Morris makes another joke and she laughs. Sweeney sends her to the office. At lunch, Moze tells Ned and Cookie that Morris is funny and can be the new class clown. Ned says he's a straight-A student, Morris won't say anything funny for Ned and Cookie.
Ned and Cookie hold auditions for a class clown. Seth and Doris both bomb, and Loomer and his cronies do a Three Stooges-esque comedy bit that turns into a real fight between the boys. Coconut Head uses the same joke Seth did, Moze tries to get Morris to audition, but he won't. Backpack Boy finally succeeds in making people laugh, and Ned makes him class clown. In the hall, Backpack Boy mocks Crubbs with a little action figure that is promptly confiscated, along with his backpack, by Crubbs.
Sweeney makes a new game for his class: "Answer my question correctly or get docked a grade point". He and Crubbs celebrate the lack of class clown. Morris makes a joke to Moze about them, and Ned, Cookie, and Gordy jump out of the nearest locker, having finally heard Morris be funny. Morris explains that he can't be a class clown, because it brings unwanted trouble. He's a straight-A student and if his mother finds out he's been goofing off, he'll be in big trouble with her. He doesn't believe that the class clown prevents people from going insane.
In Sweeney's class, he plays his new game, docking points for every wrong answer. When he asks Morris a question, he answers with a joke. Sweeney presses a red button that summons Crubbs into class. Crubbs gives Morris one more chance to give the right answer. Morris just stands up, takes Crubbs' sunglasses, and both his and Sweeney's belts so their pants fall down. When Morris is sent to the office, the storm cloud over the school fades off and the sun shines through again, making everything go back to normal.
- Tip#817.cfg - Clown around in the cafeteria = good.
- Tip#817.VPB - Clown around the vice principal = bad.
- Tip#817.bsc - Beware of sitting next to the class clown.
- Art Alexakis as Mr. Gibson
- Lil JJ as Morris Adams
- Ned mentions the Foo Fighters, Incubus, and Everclear, all of which are real bands. In fact, Art Alexakis (who plays Mr. Gibson) is the lead singer of Everclear.
- This is the only episode for Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide that is not on Amazon Prime or even the iTunes Store.
- Final appearances of The Huge Crew.
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